Thursday, May 24, 2007

Spirit of Truth

For your completely inappropriate amusement, go to YouTube and type "Spirit of Truth".

This guy is flowin' straight from the survival scrolls. In the 8:11 segment, go to about 5:20 for the best series of lines ever. You won't regret it.

EDITOR'S NOTE: This is bad, as in f-bomb every three seconds bad--which is why I didn't just post the video. But it's glorious and I highly recommend it. A big thanks to Darren for introducing me to this phenomenon.

Random Updates

1.) The Lost finale was freaking AWESOME! Heroes was good, but not as good as it could have been.

2.) I got made fun of this week at a conference for having Veronica Mars as a screensaver. (RIP, Ms. Mars. RIP.)

3.) I got a haircut. With bangs. But the side-sweepy kind, not, like, sixth-grader bangs or anything.

4.) I have a week-and-a-half before I have to get a plane again. Whee!

Also, not to be super cheesy or anything, but I had one of those moments at said conference this week where I sort of realized how far I had come in the past few years. I was standing at the bar at a random cocktail party on Monday and I had a flashback to the summer after I graduated in 2003. I was interning at a food industry magazine at VNU, and my editor (the illustrious Tara M.) had asked me if I wanted to go in her place to a super swank event at the French Culinary Institute in NYC. Considering I was making $10 an hour and eating out usually consisted of Subway, I jumped at the chance.

The event was amazing, but terrifying. I was seated at a table next to an editor at People magazine, and there were a million courses that I had no idea how to even approach eating. But the most terrifying part of all was ordering drinks at the beginning. I had never really been a wine drinker--and I honestly had no idea what even the most basic varieties were. Cabernet, Chardonnay, Merlot, etc.--all of it meant nothing to me, and this was not a situation where I could just specify red or white. The woman next to me ordered something I had never heard of at the time (probably Pinot something or other) and I just tried to play it safe by ordering what she did. And while I probably didn't look like a total idiot, it was kind of the first indication that just winging it--which I've always been decent at--might not be so easy. I felt totally out of my league.

Anyway, it's not like now I'm a social butterfly with a vast knowledge of varietals (although I now know the word varietals, which at least says something) but I realized in the past four years, I've become much more comfortable in situations I wouldn't normally put myself in. I can make small talk without being incredibly uncomfortable, I feel less out of place in most situations, and I now know that Merlot is the wine I want to order when I want to seem mildly educated but not like a totally pretentious asshole. So, I don't know. I thought that was kind of cool. But mostly cheesy. My apologies for not being my usually snarktastic self.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

The long walk

Gas prices hit $3.50 per gallon in the Nati today. I'm more than slightly bitter. And while I live close enough to work that it's actually cheaper for me to drive than to take the bus. (I'm one of the lucky ones whose employer pays for parking).

But, I still think it's time to protest the gas guzzling way of life. Tomorrow I plan to walk to work. Yep... I'm going to get up early and make the 3.32 mile trek from my house to downtown. It's actually a pretty scenic route that involves crossing the river on a beautiful bridge. By my calculations, it will take me approximately 1 hour and 15 minutes to make this journey.

Not only will I be making my statement about gasoline prices, I'll be getting exercise! This is good right?

I'll let you know how this little adventure goes, and if I'll actually do it again.


UPDATE (2 hours later): I'm SO not doing this tomorrow. On what planet would I, a person in a sordid love affair with deep and enduring sleep, choose to get up early? Besides, I have lots of stuff to carry, and I don't have a backpack.

Thursday, May 17, 2007


My life is over.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Jerry Falwell Quotes

Jerry Falwell, founder of the Moral Majority died today. I thought it would be a good time to pass along some classic quotes to mark the passing of this both loved and hated individual who left a profound mark on politics in America. Here are some classics, but you can view a larger list here:

Grown men should not be having sex with prostitutes unless they are married to them.

Billy Graham is the chief servant of Satan in America.

Textbooks are Soviet propaganda.

The whole (global warming) thing is created to destroy America's free enterprise system and our economic stability.

God continues to lift the curtain and allow the enemies of America to give us probably what we deserve.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Life, death and 4-wheelers

I saw my life flash before my eyes this weekend. Yep, and it happened at the evil hands of an All Terrain Vehicle, otherwise known as a 4-wheeler. For those of you who know me well, you are well aware of my lack of coordination and incredible fear of falling in wooded areas (long story for another time and place).

Anyway, while out with my always super adventurous bf Jonathan, in the woods, on the 4-wheeler, I nearly plummeted to my death into a rocky mountainous crag. (rocky mountainous crag or 3-foot drop into rocky creek bed -- details shmeetails) This all comes down to the fact that I didn't know what I was doing (first time 4-wheeling). I was trying to go up a hill when I got the wheel stuck, freaked out, slid backward and flipped the whole vehicle. It threw me down into the ditch where I banged up my shoulder and lower back pretty bad and ruined my favorite J. Crew summer shirt. Tragedy of tragedies.

Moral of this story: ATVs are scary. I tried it, but unless on flat ground with no obstacles and a utilitarian purpose, I don't think I'll be trying it again. I think I'll stick with the horseback riding. I prefer riding something that has a survival instinct of its own... clearly, mine is NOT enough.

Friday, May 11, 2007

How Boring Are You?

I'll start.

Every week, I get an email newsletter sent to my PERSONAL account that starts with this sentence:

Each Friday, we present a short list of the hottest whitepapers, webcasts and research available.

I'm very boring.

Thursday, May 10, 2007

The land of fried foods...and poor underwear choices.

What do the following foods have in common? McDonald's sausage biscuit and hashbrown, Chik-fil-a #1 combo with diet lemonade and plenty of mayo for the fries, Fried Chicken with mashed potatoes and cornbread, beer, and fried pickles. I'll tell you what they have in common... they were all in my stomach last Friday when I was in Memphis for the Beale Street Music Festival. I think the saturation of my mind in grease is one reason I've blogged so little lately.

In addition to the artery clogging fat forced into my blood stream, my eyes were burned by crimes against underwear... including the near capital offense to your left, which I had to document upon catching my jaw, which was clearly dragging on the pavement. Who is this woman? What is she wearing? Does she own a mirror? An equally sinister crime involved a woman with a yellow backless shirt wearing a hot pink sports bra. Yep, I think she missed the point of the shirt.

I also became aware of a new trend while roaming the park around the music festival stages--giant brightly colored rubber rain boots with teensy tiny jean skirts. Have I been under a rock? When did this trend happen? Does it have to do with proximity to the Mississippi River? I don't know, but I can say that I had a great time last weekend. Sorry I haven't blogged in while, but I'll catch up.

Free Ice Cream!

Haagen-Daz is giving away servings of its new flavors--Cinnamon Dulce de Leche and Sticky Toffee Pudding--on May 15! (From 4 p.m. to 8 p.m. only.)

Also, when I was 11 I read in Teen Beat that Elijah Wood's favorite ice cream was Haagen-Daz coffee-flavored ice cream, and that was pretty much the only flavor of ice cream I would eat for two years. This is a true story.

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Lost's End Game

Losties like myself know that the show’s producers announced an end date for the series this week. The show now has 48 episodes to go—three more seasons with 16 episodes each.

It’s an interesting decision to make, especially for the network execs, who likely care less about creative satisfaction and more about money-making possibilities. But for the past couple of TV seasons, I’ve kind of been thinking that this sort of approach might make sense for more series down the road. Shows like Friday Night Lights (which is excellent, by the way), for example, will have to introduce compelling new characters or follow the current high school juniors and seniors into college in the next two years, which will disrupt the show’s current—and very cool—formula one way or another. Unfortunately, viewers don’t seem to be willing to suspend disbelief watch characters go through their fifth senior year anymore.

And take, for example, The Nine: It started off strong this season but got canceled midway through because of the complexities of creating a long-running show based off of one event—in this case, a bank robbery. If the show had been presented as a one- or two-season deal, it would have been more workable, plot-wise, and more viewers might have tuned in.

So, I don’t know, it’s just a thought. In other TV news, my much-loved Veronica Mars is still on the brink of being canceled, but apparently Rob Thomas’ presentation of a totally new 4th season concept—which starts four years down the road with Veronica as an FBI agent—has been very well-received by CW execs. Veronica, there may be hope for you yet!

Thursday, May 3, 2007

TV Time!

Long time no blog, peeps. I’d blame it on work craziness (work has been crazy, in my defense) but it’s mostly because of my insane TV addiction. That’s right—it’s May, folks, and time for sweeps and action-packed season finales!

Here are some of the wrap-ups I’m looking forward to:

Grey’s Anatomy
Veronica Mars
Gilmore Girls
The Office
How I Met Your Mother

Grey’s is actually kicking off its last few episodes with a two-hour extravaganza tonight designed to set up Addison’s spin-off. I’m hoping for some highly angsty drama.

Also, it looks like Gilmore Girls is wrapping up at the end of this season for good. I’m not devastated, as the Girls just haven’t been as enticing the last two seasons, but I thought things were picking up the last few episodes. Oh, well. I’m sure reruns will live on at ABC Family.
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