Reading Larry Dobrow

Larry Dobrow has my dream job. Incidentally, Larry Dobrow deserves my dream job, because he’s a funnier, sharper, all-around better writer than I am. And that’s cool. That just means that I harbor an inappropriate— bordering on the line of stalker-ish—cyber crush on Larry Dobrow. For those keeping score at home, and who may now be tsk-ing because they know that I’m married, please note that crushes are acceptable within a marriage if they are prefaced by a modifier: see also “girl crush,” “celebrity crush,” etc.

Anyway, I have no idea what Larry Dobrow looks like (although I’ll admit to having Googled him), but I have joked (half-joked?) about building a shrine to him under my desk.

Larry Dobrow writes magazine reviews for MediaPost. Funny, insightful magazine reviews. Reviews that, week after week, contain at least one sentence that make me laugh out loud. Sometimes, when I read Larry Dobrow’s reviews, all is right with the world. Sometimes, when I read Larry Dobrow’s reviews, I forget that I live in Texas.

This week, Larry Dobrow reviewed the teen-targeted publication Your Prom.

A couple of choice bits:

-It (Your Prom) ranks as the rare title which boasts so little content that nearly every item can be referenced on its cover. Indeed, Your Prom is more or less a catalog, albeit one with a total absence of even slightly overweight women and a surfeit of prommed-up white chicks slathered in whorey makeup.

- For a guy just a bit outside the mag's target audience, there's a lot to learn. Owing to my refusal to appear in public after getting "the world's suckiest haircut," the "prom personality" quiz brands me as a "pessimistic partyer." My prom horoscope suggests that I should "channel my inner Beyoncé" in the months ahead, a contingency for which the tri-state area is profoundly unprepared.

If you haven’t developed an intense cyber crush on Larry Dobrow based solely on the above two tidbits, that’s cool; you and I probably were never that close anyway. If you want more Larry Dobrow goodness, go here to sign up (it's free!) to get the reviews emailed to you.